Monday, July 11, 2005

Lyndon Gets HIS.

What? Lyndon Larouche is back out of jail, huh?

Oh, I just had the greatest moment on the phone. You ever been wanting to chew somebody's ass and out of the blue a victim shows up?


Phone rings. Dan picks it up.

Dan: "Hi. Well, she's kinda got her hands full right now."

Me: "I'm making salmon patties! Who is it?"

Dan: "Somebody political."

Me: "Tell 'em just a minute while I get these in the microwave."

By this time Dan has found out it's from the Lyndon Larouche gang. And you should understand I've got beer in me. So I put the patties in the 'wave, and wash my hands.

Me: "Hello! Whatcha need?"

Larouche Woman: "Hi, I'm calling from Larouche (something). Have you heard of us?"

Me: "Oh, yeah, I've heard of you."

LW: "Well, you know that for the last 30 years, LL has been warning everyone how our system will collapse, and now it is -- "

Me: "Well, d'uh! What do you expect, if you follow capitalism?"

LW: "Well, exactly --"

Me: "I mean, capitalism is based on cheap or free resources and cheap or free labor, and once you run out, it is goin' to China!"

LW: "Yes, and we've been talking to members of the senate -- "

Me: "The SENATE? I'm hoping everybody on this continent will dry up and turn to ashes and blow away."

LW: "Well, that's not very Christian of you."

Me: "Damn right it's not. Do NOT get me started on Christians!"

Pretty soon Missy Right-Wing Serf Twat is trying to get off the phone.

Me: "Yeah, you people think YOU're radical, you haven't met ME!"

Oh, there are just some days it feels GOOD!

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