Death by Lipsynch

Drove up to Neah Bay on 112. Incredible shimmering bright day, woods full of brilliant new green, the Strait still and glimmering. Attended the institution of the Neah Bay Chamber of Commerce. First First Nations C of C in I don't know how many miles of coast.

That night, attended the Sekiu Community Center Tea. "Dress to impress," said the flyers.

At the door, a pretty teenage girl asked me if I would like an escort. Well! Very elegant. I hooked my hand into her proffered elbow.

Inside, tables set diagonally were covered in green cloths. One of the retiring teachers had lent part of her huge tea-service collection for the event. Everyone had a different teacup and saucer. It was like tea with the Desert Peach. Gardens from all over had contributed bouquets -- so there was a lot of rhododendron and lilac. Student projects along the walls, including a couple of nice quilts made by a local boy (don't you love how the kids are dumping those stupid sex roles?).

Poetry, essays.

Fashion show.

Funniest damn fashion show. Wonderfully elegant dresses, including a black wrap-around over cobalt blue embroidery. One VERY tall skinny kid (musta been a van Riper) in a brilliant white suit and little round black sunglasses. Girls walked as they usually did in blue jeans, and everybody was giggling their heads off. A boy all in black tried to keep his face straight reading very haut coiture descriptions of the outfits, but, as he'd said before, "I don't do dresses." He got most of the words right, anyway.

Then they all came out to take a bow, and the band started a dance on the runway area.

God. FUNNY. They were doing all sorts of comedy dances. In these long formals and fancy suits. Tromp and jump and stamp and just howl with laughter. Log-camp dancing in fancy dress. They asked audience members up. I could NOT stop laughing. Across the runway, I saw a woman in her '70s's, and she was laughing as hard as I was. The sense of put-on was just tooooo delicious.

Afterwards, when everybody had stopped gasping, three boys and a teacher got up. In stupid wigs.

"The girls were going to have a lip-synch contest," one said. "But then they decided not to. So we'll just do this."

Okay. THE funniest -- and most spot-on -- lipsynch of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody.

Teacher on air piano. Another kid on air guitar.

Two huge kids doing the lyrics.

By Mama mia, mama mia the audience was laughing so hard it was crying. I swear. I mean, I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I've had my endorphin shot for the whole year.

Finally they tore off their raggedy outer shirts and revealed the Bruins' (local highschool) Football Team T. Howls and stomping and even more laughing.

Who says we don't have a club scene?